Trapped in Kayfabe: WWE Extreme Rules 2021

I like the guy with the cross.

by Michael Cruz

My picks for Extreme Rules:

Roman Reigns (c) vs. “The Demon” Finn Bálor, Universal Champion Championship

Remember when Finn Balor made his Wrestlemania entrance with all those gay flags? lol. Prediction: The Big Dog

Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Alexa Bliss, Raw Women’s Championship

Alexa is the best looking chick on the show, so why put her in the creepy makeup? Stupid. Prediction: Alexa Bliss

Becky Lynch (c) vs. Bianca Belair, SmackDown Women’s Championship

In a sport where everything is dumb, wrestling with a five foot pony tail might be the dumbest idea yet. Prediction: My bathroom break doesn't take long enough.

Damian Priest (c) vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Sheamus, United States Championship


I'm pretty sure Damian Priest is Satan. Likewise, Sheamus sports crosses. Obviously I want Sheamus to win, but I think Priest pins Hardy. Prediction: Satan

The Usos (c) vs. The Street Profits, SmackDown Tag Team Championship Match

The skinny (by wrestling standards) guy annoys the shit out of me even more than the Usos' bizarre hood accent. Prediction: Usos

Liv Morgan vs. Carmella

So 3 out of 6 matches this show are women's matches? Prediction: I put my kids to bed without a fight because they think this show sucks too.


Wowza. I haven’t been this uninterested in a PPV since Hell in a Cell, way back in June. WWE has been hit or miss lately. This month is a big miss. I just want my monthly wrestling fix but instead we get three women’s matches and a bunch of jabronis I don’t care about. If WWE wants me to stay interested, I suggest they feature better male wrestlers. Prediction: I fall asleep before the main event.

Read The Dirtsheets, a dark comedy pro wrestling graphic novel, on Amazon Kindle or paperback

Michael Cruz is a casual wrestling fan who has the internet and is therefore an expert on all things wrestling.

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