Trapped in Kayfabe: WWE Extreme Rules 2021

I like the guy with the cross.

by Michael Cruz

My picks for Extreme Rules:

Roman Reigns (c) vs. “The Demon” Finn Bálor, Universal Champion Championship

Remember when Finn Balor made his Wrestlemania entrance with all those gay flags? lol. Prediction: The Big Dog

Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Alexa Bliss, Raw Women’s Championship

Alexa is the best looking chick on the show, so why put her in the creepy makeup? Stupid. Prediction: Alexa Bliss

Becky Lynch (c) vs. Bianca Belair, SmackDown Women’s Championship

In a sport where everything is dumb, wrestling with a five foot pony tail might be the dumbest idea yet. Prediction: My bathroom break doesn't take long enough.

Damian Priest (c) vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Sheamus, United States Championship


I'm pretty sure Damian Priest is Satan. Likewise, Sheamus sports crosses. Obviously I want Sheamus to win, but I think Priest pins Hardy. Prediction: Satan

The Usos (c) vs. The Street Profits, SmackDown Tag Team Championship Match

The skinny (by wrestling standards) guy annoys the shit out of me even more than the Usos' bizarre hood accent. Prediction: Usos

Liv Morgan vs. Carmella

So 3 out of 6 matches this show are women's matches? Prediction: I put my kids to bed without a fight because they think this show sucks too.


Wowza. I haven’t been this uninterested in a PPV since Hell in a Cell, way back in June. WWE has been hit or miss lately. This month is a big miss. I just want my monthly wrestling fix but instead we get three women’s matches and a bunch of jabronis I don’t care about. If WWE wants me to stay interested, I suggest they feature better male wrestlers. Prediction: I fall asleep before the main event.

Read The Dirtsheets, a dark comedy pro wrestling graphic novel, on Amazon Kindle or paperback

Michael Cruz is a casual wrestling fan who has the internet and is therefore an expert on all things wrestling.

ABC Degeneracy: An Alphabet Book for Degenerates, available on Amazon October 8

ABC Degeneracy now on preorder

The Alphabet Gets Degenerate!

What could be more fun than learning about the alphabet and degeneracy at the same time? ABC Degeneracy introduces children to the alphabet in an easy and enjoyable format with colorful globohomo illustrations and the degeneracy that plagues our culture.

A LEARNING ADVENTURE

– Discover degeneracies for every letter of the alphabet.

EDUCATIONAL

– Prevent your child from becoming an illiterate degenerate.

FUN!

– Great birthday or holiday gift for people of all ages.
– Must have for new parents, a great baby shower gift!
– Perfect for the degenerates in your life.

ABC Degeneracy is Richie Richards’ first children’s book. It is available now on preorder for Kindle and paperback release on October 8. Preorder here.

Trapped in Kayfabe: All Out 2021

by Michael Cruz

My picks for AEW All Out:

CM Punk vs. Darby Allin

Punk hasn't wrestled in seven years(!) but he was the best the world. Darby Allin only weighs about 17 pounds. Prediction: CM Punk

Kenny Omega (c) vs. Christian Cage - AEW World Championship

Kenny is too good. Christian is too old. Prediction: Kenny Omega

Dr. Britt Baker (c) vs. Kris Statlander - AEW Women's World Championship


As a Pittsburgher, I'm compelled to like to Britt Baker. Prediction: Britt Baker

The Young Bucks (c) vs. Lucha Bros - AEW World Tag Team Championship, Steel Cage Match


This will be the best match of the night. The Lucha Bros are awesome, but crazy. Too crazy for their own good. Prediction: The Young Bucks

Paul Wight vs. QT Marshall

I don't watch enough to know who QT Marshall is. Regardless, Wight is literally a giant. Prediction: The Big Show.

Jon Moxley vs. Satoshi Kojima

Again, never heard of Satoshi Kojima. Apparently he's Japanese. America first. Prediction: Mox

Chris Jericho vs. MJF, Final Fight

So if MJF wins, Chris Jericho leaves the company. As much as I like Y2J, I think MJF has some dirty tricks up his scarf. Prediction: MJF

Miro (c) vs. Eddie Kingston - TNT Championship

Eddie is likely to pass out from listening to Miro's pyro. Prediction: Miro

Matt Hardy Private Party vs. The Best Friends and Jurassic Express

My son is obsessed with dinosaurs, so Luchasaurus and Jungle Boy are his favorite wrestlers right now. I like The Best Friends. After all, how can you not like a couple of dudes who are best friends living the dream? Prediction: Jungle Boy ftw

Women's Casino Royale

On AEW's advertisement for this match, they feature 19 women and one dude pretending to be a woman front and center. lol. Prediction: I change the channel.
one of these is not like the others

AEW always puts on a good pay per view. The crowd during Punk’s match will be nuts. Prediction: Tonight will be fun.

Read The Dirtsheets, a dark comedy pro wrestling graphic novel, on Amazon Kindle or paperback

Michael Cruz is a casual wrestling fan who has the internet and is therefore an expert on all things wrestling.