Trapped in Kayfabe: All Out 2021

by Michael Cruz

My picks for AEW All Out:

CM Punk vs. Darby Allin

Punk hasn't wrestled in seven years(!) but he was the best the world. Darby Allin only weighs about 17 pounds. Prediction: CM Punk

Kenny Omega (c) vs. Christian Cage - AEW World Championship

Kenny is too good. Christian is too old. Prediction: Kenny Omega

Dr. Britt Baker (c) vs. Kris Statlander - AEW Women's World Championship


As a Pittsburgher, I'm compelled to like to Britt Baker. Prediction: Britt Baker

The Young Bucks (c) vs. Lucha Bros - AEW World Tag Team Championship, Steel Cage Match


This will be the best match of the night. The Lucha Bros are awesome, but crazy. Too crazy for their own good. Prediction: The Young Bucks

Paul Wight vs. QT Marshall

I don't watch enough to know who QT Marshall is. Regardless, Wight is literally a giant. Prediction: The Big Show.

Jon Moxley vs. Satoshi Kojima

Again, never heard of Satoshi Kojima. Apparently he's Japanese. America first. Prediction: Mox

Chris Jericho vs. MJF, Final Fight

So if MJF wins, Chris Jericho leaves the company. As much as I like Y2J, I think MJF has some dirty tricks up his scarf. Prediction: MJF

Miro (c) vs. Eddie Kingston - TNT Championship

Eddie is likely to pass out from listening to Miro's pyro. Prediction: Miro

Matt Hardy Private Party vs. The Best Friends and Jurassic Express

My son is obsessed with dinosaurs, so Luchasaurus and Jungle Boy are his favorite wrestlers right now. I like The Best Friends. After all, how can you not like a couple of dudes who are best friends living the dream? Prediction: Jungle Boy ftw

Women's Casino Royale

On AEW's advertisement for this match, they feature 19 women and one dude pretending to be a woman front and center. lol. Prediction: I change the channel.
one of these is not like the others

AEW always puts on a good pay per view. The crowd during Punk’s match will be nuts. Prediction: Tonight will be fun.

Read The Dirtsheets, a dark comedy pro wrestling graphic novel, on Amazon Kindle or paperback

Michael Cruz is a casual wrestling fan who has the internet and is therefore an expert on all things wrestling.